Sunday, August 21, 2016

Living A Life Offline

Hi all,

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated here, I've been sick the past month and at the height of it was on a med dosing schedule that kept me busy around the clock (taking meds eight times a day. Insanity. You should see the log I kept to keep them all straight.)

Anyway, since the demise of my publisher (that sentence still puts a lump in my throat) I find I am living a more offline life in general, since I'm not obliged to promote my (now out of print) books anymore. They're up on Wattpad, people know it, and they are still being read. So that part makes me happy.

I've got a lot going on personally and health-wise right now, so you might not see much of me here for awhile. I'm trying to be better about tweeting... FB is hit or miss.

The blogosphere is mostly a ghost town these days for everyone it seems (at least most of the bloggers I used to know) and I've even wondered if there's a point to keeping this one at all any more. I'll ponder it awhile. As long as there are times when I feel I have something I want to say and need a place to say it, this serves best, and so I don't quite want to let that go yet.

In any event, I hope you've all been having a good summer. I can feel autumn whispering on the wind and I'm not sure I'm ready; I feel like I've missed summer altogether but then as hot as it has been there isn't much I could do outside anyway.

I feel like I'm poised on the edge of finding out what I'm supposed to be doing with the rest of my life, now that writing isn't my highest priority creatively. Still I hover on the edge of the cliff, unsure if now is the time to try my wings.

I've just picked up a paint brush again and am waiting still for new med routines to settle in before I know what I am capable of creatively, exactly, now. I am to the point where I miss writing, but I do not miss writing making me unhappy.

I never forget the daily battle I am dealing with living with Bipolar, and if the trade off is giving up most creative pursuits to be healthier and happier, then for the sake of myself and my family, that is the choice I have to make.

Here's a photo for you, my latest painting, Mosaic Heart.

I hope you are all well... I think of so many of you so much more often than you know.