Monday, October 9, 2017

OctPoWriMo Day 9: Off prompt... My struggle with writing and Bipolar Disorder

I'm looking at the calendar and thinking ahead... it's almost November... which for me, means it's almost time for National Novel Writing Month.

I've participated in NaNoWriMo since 2008 (only missing one year due to health issues) and also written novels for several Camp NaNoWriMo events as well.

This year, I'm uncertain if I should participate. That almost never happens, but it's happening now.

I've just started to feel the positive effects of a new Bipolar med added to my cocktail after over two weeks of waiting and seeing. I feel more balanced for the first time in a long time and I am unsure if I should let the process of writing a novel (which always makes me manic) interrupt that new-found balance.

I know what my doctor would say. I know what my therapist would say. I'm writing poetry, I'm writing, SOMETHING, right now. Isn't that enough?

But I have this obsession with novels... at least when an idea gets a hold of me and won't let go. Maybe that's the issue this year, too, I haven't been hit by that lightning bolt idea that demands to be written.

In any event I am considering my options. I still have time to think about it, change my mind, change it back again, and see how I feel come November 1st. That is what really matters.

So my off-prompt poem for today is obviously about my love/hate/obsession with writing... I hope you like it.

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The Struggle by February Grace

invite trouble
muse or siren
whatever they may be
they possess a power over
my heart, mind and soul, sinking
taking me under a sea of obsession
from which there is no escape, except to
accept what it is and see it through until
its only possible conclusion, writing words I long to pen:

The End

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